LtDan's 1986 Chevy Caprice Wagon - The day after I got it, a friend of mine called it the 'Tank'. Maybe. It rode kinda like a Sherman. It was grey, of course. Then I got it painted red, and he suggested 'Red Streak'. That sounded a little gross, so I adopted 'Big Red'.
Add's '78 Caprice was called 'Mega' by his highschool friends. His second '78 was called Bounty, after the SS Bounty, named by his wife. Oh, and his '84 Cavalier Wagon was "Turbo Cavvy".
Chris calls his the 'paddy wagon', "cuz ya got to be nutz to drive a wagon."
Tamas cruises around town in his '85 Caprice Wagon. Limo tint, a whole lotta dress up, bumpin stereo and all deserve the names "Da Big Caprice", "The Mean Machine", and "The Monster". His dearly departed '77 Caprice 4 door shared this notoriety. His girlfriend's sister refers to him as "19 and he drives a pimped-up station wagon".
If pimps could only be so stylish...
Greg's '76 Gran Torino wagon, sporting a dark green metallic paint job (almost like military green), had a vanity plate which read: TANQUE
Hua!
Jim, a Palm Springs resident who had a thing for Dinah Shore, named his 73 Grand Safari "Dinah". His friends, not quite understanding the love affair, used to say "Don't you mean DINOsaur?" He has since parted companies with those honda enthusiasts.
Dave's '58 Edsel Bermuda (!!) was called "Shorts", his '81 Impala Wagon was "Box" (due to it's license plate: 1box878), his '57 Squire is "Wallpaper Woody", the '58 County Sedan goes by "CS", the '65 Cad ambulance is "Meat-Wagon", the '62 Cad hearse simply "Marilyn", my trusty work car, a '68 Ford Falcon with 300K miles is "The Roach".
Holy shit, Dave!!! When they were doing the 'Hundred years of the automobile parade' in Detroit, why didn't they just call you?
Flo Wolfe's '73 Pinto wagon had a distasteful name bestowed upon it by the guys in high school: Headmobile. Her parents had a green '71 Chevy clamshell known as the "Green Machine", and later a white '74 clamshell know as "The Great White Boat" or just "Great White" for short. Her earliest memories were of mommy blowing the doors off of mustangs and camaros from stoplight to stoplight. This influence has led her to adapt the "Great White" moniker to her '91 Olds, possibly with the license plate GR8WYT.
If I wasn't a greaser and were it not for the obnoxious burnouts, my car might've been dubbed the Headmobile. Maybe when pigs flew out my ass.
* Geeze, Flo, sorry. I didn't know you were a female. Man. Sorry. I guess "Headmobile" WOULD be a whole lot less attractive for a girl to drive!
Antonio just picked of a 1963 Impala 9 passenger Wagon. His friends and neighbors have pooled their love, calling his beast the "War-Wagon".
Cool. That's vanity plate material, my man! WARWAGN
Dave has had names for all his cars, but his current two wagons haven't earned them yet. He did have a '70 Cadillac S&S hearse his wife called "Morticia". So, when he got a ratty limo for parts, he called it "Gomez".
Did you buy IT on a WEDNESDAY ????
The father of Colony Park Guy had a '72 Olds (or was it a Chevy?), puke green and white, and she was called "Elizabeth Gertrude".
Uh, it sounds like an Olds name to me, CP...
Patrick's '69 Kingswood Estate, which was Dover White and woodgrained, was named by the neighborhood kids: "Moby Dick". His buds call it "The Big White Woodie". He calls it the "Kingswood Family Truckster".
Eric's first wagon, a blue '86 Celebrity, was named "Betsy Mae" by it's original owner, his grandfather, and he kept the name. His current car, an '87 Mercury Colony Park, is named "Tifanny". His '2 T-bird was "Frances", '82 Grand Marquis: "Francine". His AMC never had a name, but that's okay because he only drove it 30 feet, and 25 of those feet occured before he ran it straight into the garage.
Ouch....
Paul's first car was a '61 Ford Ranch Wagon. It was blue-green, and the lady she bought it from called it "Grizzy". I thought "Dinosaur" was more appropriate, which later became my CB handle. He's contemplating a name for his new wagon, a '61 Pontiac Tempest Safari. "Hmmmm, 'teapot'?
Thomas Frogh's '72 Plymouth Fury Suburban is NAMED "Harvey". His nickname is "The Arc of the Convent", because it's so big, ugly and base-modelish, that it should've been a nun mobile. Also in his fleet: 2000 Diesel Beetle, "Biesel". 1997 Del Sol "Gherkin". 1995 Park Avenue "Big Bitch" (likes to stomp on 3 series Bimmers). 1978 Volare (frog colored) "Kermit". 1973 Beetle "Excelsior". His mother started his nicknaming obsession by dubbing their '72 Fury Grand Sedan "Batmobile" and their 77 Fury "James".
We, and everyone in his family, think he's nuts.
Virginia, the soccer mom, has a favorite wagon nickname: "Rumbelina the Battle Wagon". Her Buick is just called "Beast".
Sounds like the car that Xena would drive...
Mike calls his '72 Fury Sport Suburban the "Exxon Valdiz".
Sometimes when I'm pouring my weekly quart of oil into my engine, I look around to see if Captain Hazelwood has been piloting my ship!
Randy's little brother calls his wagon the "Hooptie Mobile". Just to avoid any confusion with other hoopties, his brother actually wrote and recorded a song about it!
Redbear's Dad called his '55 Nomad "Dad's Nomad". They also had a '68 navy blue Buick Sportwagon that was originally owned by a convent. This ride, of course, was called the "Nunmobile". The power package that this buggy came with used to inspire visions of a stationwagon of nuns haulin ass down the freeway with everyone on board clutching their rosary, including the driving!
One individual, someone we can only call the Station-wagon guy, has a blue 87 Taurus LX. The car once got some bad gas, and went around for weeks belching out foul smelling black smoke. During this time the car became known as "the Blue Stink Bug" or "Smelly Nelly". The stink bug name stuck, although now it's just called "The Big Blue Bug".
And he went on to explain how his love affair with wagons isn't WRONG, just very misunderstood and totally acceptable for consenting adults (?!).
Mr HWM Jr calls his 1971 Safari "The Big Kahuna".
Dave Blum's 69 BelAir Wagon answers to the name "Deadsled". Behind his car's back, they just call it "The Sled". The car has been owned by quite a few people, oddly enough though, he has bought the same car a couple time (made an error in selling it!).
Dave's friend has a 71 Chevy Wagon that's booger-green and it's called "The Beast".
If I had a booger-green car, I'd call it the SNEEZE.
Doug, a fellow hoser, noticed that someone on this page had taken his wagon's nickname, and his rebuke was an epic one: "Dad's 1978 Mercury Marquis Wagon was called "The War Wagon in Training". It's engine detonated before it was out of training. Dad's copper 1979 Buick Lesabre Estate Wagon was titled "The Mighty Highland War Wagon, Mark I " , and my uncle dubbed it the "Horse Wagon".
Some more nicknames from Doug: 89 Buick Electra Estate Wagon - Mighty Highland War Wagon, Mark II. It's also called "The Shaggin Wagon", "The Beast", and "The Griswoldmobile". His friend's 72 Ford LTD Country Squire is "The Green Giant".
